英语作文修改

2025-02-12 15:56:53

推荐回答（2个）

回答1：

Sunday, March 25 Fine

Today our class went out to do some cleaning as a respond to the government's calling. We gathered at the school gate and started out early in the morning. On arrival,some of us collected rubbish in the park, some cleared the old posters off the walls, and others swept the street. We has been hoping to make our city more beautiful with our own hands. At the same time some of us went to public places, where there were a lot of people. We kept on calling people not to destroy the beauty of nature so that we can have a cleaner world.

However,still some people are not aware of the importance of protecting the environment at present. They often make our surroundings dirty and ugly. From my point of view,all citizens are supposed to do something for the surroungings we are living in,so such activities are necessary and instructive,and I believe we will live a better life in the near future if we have the desire to complete the great project together!

回答2：

修改如下：

Sunday，March 25 Fine

Today our class went out to do some cleaning.
We gathered at the school gate and started out early in the morning. Some collected the rubbish in the park, some cleared the old posters off the walls, some swept the (streets), and others cleared the lawns. We hoped to make our city more beautiful with our own hands.
At the same time, some of us went to (去掉the) public places, where there were a lot of people. We kept on telling (them) not to destroy the beauty of nature so that we (could) have a cleaner world.
Some people (are) not aware of the importance of protecting the environment at present. They often make our surroundings dirty and ugly.
It's our duty to protect the environment so I think such activities are necessary and instructive.

总结：楼主这篇文章总的来说相当不错。但是：
1）作文最好要分段，特别是在考试中，这样评卷人能够一目了然地了解你的行文思路。
2）作文所要求的要点不能缺失，否则会扣分。如楼主忘写：清理草坪/爱护环境，人人有责。
3）至于其他一些小毛病，我已用括号标出。相信楼主能明白，所以不再赘述，请原谅。

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