推荐回答(4个)
从前有两只小兔子,小白兔是妻子,小黑兔是丈夫,有一天小黑兔去了森林里,一整天都没有回来,小白兔担心了,于是就去森林里找他。可是小白兔走了一夜也没有找到小黑兔,这时她看到一只小灰兔,她就上去问:“小灰兔小灰兔,你看见我的丈夫小黑兔了吗?”小灰兔见小白兔白白胖胖很漂亮,就打起了坏主意,说:“看见了,但是……嘿嘿,你想知道吗?”小白兔说:“想啊想啊!”小灰兔笑着说:“那你得先让我爽一下!”小白兔很爱小黑兔,为了能快点找到小黑兔,她就答应了小灰兔。完事之后,小灰兔告诉了她方向。小白兔走啊走,走了一天还没有找到小黑兔,这时她看到一只小黄兔,她就上去问:“小黄兔小黄兔,你看见我的丈夫小黑兔了吗?”小黄兔见小白兔白白胖胖很漂亮,也打起了坏主意,说:“看见了,但是……嘿嘿,你想知道吗?”小白兔说:“想啊想啊!”小黄兔笑着说:“那你得先让我爽一下!”小白兔还是很爱小黑兔,为了能快点找到小黑兔,她就又答应了小黄兔。完事之后,小黄兔告诉了她方向,小白兔又走啊走,然后又遇见小红兔小绿兔小青兔小蓝兔小紫兔小棕兔……都一一答应了他们的要求,最后终于找到了小黑兔。小白兔怕小黑兔知道她和其他小兔子的事情会生气,就没有告诉小黑兔。
一年之后,小白兔生下了一只小小兔,你知道小小兔是什么颜色的吗?
一天小鸡碰见了小猪.小猪对小鸡说:“小鸡小鸡你为什么不洗澡啊?你现在比我都脏.”小鸡回答道:“因为我妈妈不让我洗.她说我洗澡时搓自己很恶心.”
"两个农民在田地里干活,
甲农对乙农说"听说现在火车提倭?我们去看看吧"
于是两人到田地旁的火车轨道旁等火车.
之后有辆火车飞奔而来,车厢卫生间里某妇女换好WSJ,直接扔出窗外.
结果打到某农民脸上,
""册啦,现在火车速度的确不得了,一张纸飞出来就把我脸打出血了""
2一个女的去算命
算命先生说”你这一生,都带着一个凶兆‘‘‘‘”
女的很惊恐:”那‘‘‘‘‘我把它脱了呢?”
算命先生又语重心长的说”那也无法躲过你前面的两个大波‘‘”
3 面条和馒头吵架了,面条气呼呼的说:“你等着我回去找人来揍你!”于是回去纠结了方便面、米粉、面粉一起去报仇。不一会他们发现了豆沙包,以为是馒头,于是上去不分青红皂白的把它打一顿。回去开心的告诉面条说 :“放心吧! 我们已经帮你报仇了! 那小子连屎都给我们打出来了!”
3.四只老鼠吹牛:甲:我每天都拿鼠药当糖吃;乙:我一天不踩老鼠夹脚发痒;丙:我每天不过几次大街不踏实;丁:时间不早了,回家抱猫去咯。
5.一只小狗爬上你的餐桌,向一只烧鸡爬去,你大怒道:你敢对那只烧鸡怎样,我就敢对你怎样,结果小狗舔了一下鸡屁股,你昏倒,小狗乐道:小样看谁狠。
8.一老汉坐车去高潮镇,因没去过所以每过一站就问女售票员高潮到了没有,问了多次以后,女售票员实在不耐烦了,说道:高潮到了,我会叫的!
9.20年前爸爸抱着你等车,人都笑话孩子长得难看,爸爸哭了。一卖香蕉的老大爷拍拍爸爸说:“大兄弟别哭了,拿只香蕉给猴子吃吧!真可怜,饿的都没毛了。”
10.飞机上,一只鹦鹉对空姐说:“给爷来杯水”,猪也学鹦鹉,对空姐说:“给爷来杯水”,空姐大怒,将鹦鹉和猪都扔下了飞机。这时鹦鹉对猪说:“S B 了吧,爷会飞。”
11.有个老农在地里锄地,一只乌鸦飞过,拉了.泡.屎.掉在老农脸上,老农抬头大骂:“C 你 MA!出门也不知道穿条裤衩!” 乌鸦说: “C!你.丫.拉.屎.穿裤衩呀!”v
春节,爸爸到店里看望当小伙计的儿子时,恰好遇见老板。
爸爸对老板说:
“我这孩子傻头傻脑的,给您添麻烦了,不对的地方,请您多指教。”
老板表示客气地说:
“别看小时候笨,长大了往往会变得聪明起来的;有的人小时候看着倒聪明,可是长大了却变成傻瓜了。”
听了这话后,小伙计忙说:“老板您小时候一定是个聪明的孩子”
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