1分钟小学生的英语笑话英文笑话，有吗？

急英文+汉译

2025-02-05 19:44:25

推荐回答（4个）

回答1：

1
副总裁
　　
　　A man who had just been promoted to vice-president boasted so much about it to his wife that she finally retorted, “Vice-presidents are a dozen a dime. Why, in the supermarket they even have a vice-president in charge of prunes.”
　　Furious, the husband phoned the supermarket in the expectation of refuting his wife. He asked to speak to the vice-president in charge of prunes.
　　“Which kind?” was the reply. “Fresh or dried?”
　　
　　释文
　　
　　刚被提升为副总的丈夫向妻子大吹大擂，妻子终于反驳道：“副总裁一毛钱买一打。你看超级市场里甚至有一名负责李子的副总裁呢。”
　　恼怒的丈夫立即给超级市场打电话，准备驳斥妻子。他要求与负责李子的副总裁通话。
　　“管哪方面的？”对方答道。“鲜货还是干货？”
WhoShouldBeGiventheGift？

2.
Afatheroffivechildrencamehomewithatoy，summonedhischildrenandaskedwhichoneofthemshouldbegiventhepresent，“Whoisthemostobedient，nev�ertalksbacktoMotheranddoesevery�thingheorsheistold？”heinquired．Therewassilence，andthenachorusofvoices:“Youplaywithit，Daddy牎”（译文）礼物该给谁？

一位有五个孩子的父亲带着一件玩具回到家里，把孩子们召集起来问这件礼物该给谁。“谁最听话，从不和妈妈顶嘴，父母让干什么就干什么？”他问道。大家都不吭声。过了一会儿，孩子们异口同声地说：“爸爸，您玩吧。”

3.
Oneday，theteacherinquiredPeter:“Howmuchisfourminusfour？”Peterwastongue－tired．Theteachergotangryandsaid:“Whatafool牎Yousee，ifIputfourcoinsinyourpocket，butthereisaholeinyourpocketandallofthemleakout，nowwhatisleftinyourpock�et？”“Thehole，”repliedPeter．（译文）四减四等于几？

一天，老师问彼得：“4减4等于几？”彼得张口结舌答不上来。老师生气地说：“真笨！你想，我要是往你口袋里放四个硬币，而你的口袋上有个窟窿，硬币全漏掉了，那么，你衣袋里还剩下什么？”“窟窿。”彼得答道。

回答2：

Good Boy

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."

好孩子

小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了？”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？”
“她是个卖糖果的。”

回答3：

The wise never marry, And when they marry they become otherwise.
　　聪明人都是未婚的,结婚的人很难再聪明起来.
　　
　　 Success is a relative term. It brings so many relatives.
　　成功是一个相关名词,他会给你带来很多不相关的亲戚（联系）.
　　
　　 Never put off the work till tomorrow what you can put off today.
　　不要等明天交不上差再找借口, 今天就要找好.
　　
　　 Love is photogenic. It needs darkness to develop.
　　爱情就象照片,需要大量的暗房时间来培养. （老外也保守，要摸黑办事，哈哈）
　　
　　 Children in backseats cause accidents. Accidents in backseats cause children.
　　后排座位上的小孩会生出意外, 后排座位上的意外会生出小孩.
　　
　　 "Your future depends on your dreams." So go to sleep.
　　 "现在的梦想决定着你的将来",所以还是再睡一会吧.
　　
　　 There should be a better way to start a day than waking up every morning.
　　应该有更好的方式开始新一天,而不是千篇一律的在每个上午都醒来.
　　
　　 "Hard work never killed anybody." But why take the risk? "
　　努力工作不会导致死亡!"不过我不会用自己去证明.
　　
　　 "Work fascinates me." I can look at it for hours! "
　　工作好有意思耶!"尤其是看着别人工作.
　　
　　 God made relatives; Thank God we can choose our friends.
　　神决定了谁是你的亲戚,幸运的是在选择朋友方面他给了你留了余地.
　　
　　 When two‘s company, three‘s the result!
　　两个人的状态是不稳定的,三个人才是!
　　
　　 A dress is like a barbed fence. It protects the premises without restricting the view.
　　服饰就象铁丝网,它阻止你冒然行动但并不妨碍你尽情的观看.
　　
　　 The more you learn, the more you know, The more you know, the more you forget. The more you forget, the less you know. So why bother to learn.
　　学的越多,知道的越多, 知道的越多,忘记的越多, 忘记的越多,知道的越少,为什么学来着?!

回答4：

The manager of a large corporation got a heart attack, and

the doctor told him to go for several weeks to a farm to relax.

The guy went to a farm, and after a couple of days he was very

bored, so he asked the farmer to give him some job to do.

一家大公司的经理得了心脏病，医生让他去农场休息几周。经理来到了农场，两天以后他觉得太无聊了，就要求农场主给他点活干。

The farmer told him to clean the shit of the cows. The farmer

thought that to somebody coming from the city, working the whole

life sitting in an office, it will take over a week to finish

the job, but for his surprise the manager finished the job in

less than one day.

农场主让他去清理牛粪。农场主想到，这个人从城里来，一辈子坐在办公室里，估计需要一个多星期才能把这个活干完。令他吃惊的是，经理不到一天就把活干完了。

The next day the farmer gave to the manager a more difficult job:

to cut the heads of 500 chickens. The farmer was sure that the

manager will not be able to do the job, but at the end of the

day the job was done.

第二天，农场主给经理更难干的活：去剁掉500只鸡头。农场主满以为经理干不了这个活，没想到不到一天活又干完了。

The next morning, as most of the jobs in the farm were done,

the farmer asked the manager to divide a bag of potatoes in

two boxes: one box with small potatoes, and one box with

big potatoes.

第三天早晨，因为农场的活都干的差不离了，农场主只好吩咐经理把一大袋土豆分成两箱：一箱小土豆，一箱大土豆。

At the end of the day the farmer saw that the manager was

sitting in front of the potatoes bag, but the two boxes were

empty. The farmer asked the manager: "How is that you made such

difficult jobs during the first days, and now you cannot do

this simple job?"

这一天快过完的时候，农场主发现经理还坐在土豆袋面前，那两个箱子却是空的。农场主就问经理：“头两天你把那么不好干的活都干完了，现在怎么连这么简单的活都干不了？”

The manager answered: "Listen, all my life I'm cutting heads

and dealing with shit, but now you ask me to make decisions."

经理回答道：“听着，我一辈子都在裁掉人头和处理垃圾，现在你却要我去做决定。”（译注：dealing with shit 是老外的常用语，意思是指处理一些难办又意义不大的事情。shit又指粪便，这里是一语双关

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